torn

I believe that one of the most hurtful things one can do is ignore someone else. Although noone wants to be disliked, or mad at, even if it seems negative it still means they are important enough for you to acknowledge their existence, but when you ignore someone it turns them into something insignificant. And we all know we all crave and hunger to be wanted, needed and loved. See, Im not THAT mean. But then what do i do? Oh Priscila... where is all this going? As usual my rambling goes no where... im frustrated at this.

As I mentioned the other day, Ive been trying not to think of a friend. But its his birthday today... I should call him, text him or in some way, shape or form acknowledge his existence; and yet, I just dont know if I should... See, through his actions he has made it clear that I mean nothing to him so why bother. I could be a silly girl and rationalize myself out of this and make excuses for him - "he is afraid ill be mad" or "he is too proud to say sorry". But why make excuses for a grown man? 'I should be the bigger person' you'll say... but what do I have to win? I dont know... it is true that what I get from him I dont get from anyone else (so far)... but I dont know if its worth it anymore. Our relationship has almost always been about me trying, working and leaving wanting.

So to call or not to call, that is my question...
What kills me, is that Im not surprised all this happen.

Torn - Pree.